Friday, April 29, 2022

Blog Love Omega Glee In Print!

I received a copy of the print edition of Blog Love Omega Glee, and, just as with the print edition of Fast Guy Slows Down, Amazon did a really nice job!  The novel is very long (the print edition is actually at Amazon's limit--828 pages), so the book is very big.  It could be a murder weapon or an industrial strength doorstop (please don't use it for the former--the latter is OK though).  I just measured it, and it's over 2 inches thick.  So far, it looks well-constructed, but we'll see how it does with multiple rereadings.  In any case, it's nice to have a print version of this novel that can be put on the bookshelf along with my other novels.  I'm not planning on selling any of these directly, so if anyone does want an autographed copy, just get in touch (wredfright where'sitat yahoo dott dott dott com--you'll figure it out if you're a human), and you can either mail me one with a self-address stamped envelope or make arrangements to buy one through me--we'll figure it out.  If you don't want an autographed copy, then this way please:

And here's some bonus Yeast?:

Wednesday, April 27, 2022

Print Edition Of Fast Guy Slows Down!

I received a print copy of Fast Guy Slows Down, and, once again, Amazon has done a terrific job with their print on demand work!  It really is a nice trade paperback.  It looks good!  It could be on the shelf at Barnes & Noble with all the trade paperbacks printed in China and just blend right in.  If a bibliophile sniffed around closely, then he or she might be able to discern that it was handcrafted (metaphorically, I'm sure they're using machines to do this, but they are producing them presumably one at a time when someone just orders a copy) and made in the USA.  Once again, I am very pleased with their work and grateful that I don't have to order 500 or 1000 copies of the novel and have the boxes sitting in my garage for the next decade until the print run is sold out.  If anyone does want an autographed copy, just get in touch (wredfright where'sitat yahoo dott dott dott com--you'll figure it out if you're a human), and you can either mail me one with a self-address stamped envelope or make arrangements to buy one through me--we'll figure it out.  If you don't want an autographed copy, then this way please:

And now some bonus Yeast? for the soundtrack while you're deciding whether to order an ebook (cheaper) or a print book (nicer) (it's a short song, so think quickly!):

Tuesday, April 26, 2022

New Recording!: "Canaries"

In 1996, I watched a multipart documentary about World War I called The Great War And The Shaping Of The 20th Century.  One of the most interesting aspects of the film was a small bit about women working in a factory building bombs getting yellow stains from the material they were working with and being nicknamed canaries as a result.  That inspired this song.  The GoGoBots played it first, and it's stayed in the set since then.  For this rerecording, I played the usual instruments, adding a toy microphone and some vocal silliness for the bomb sounds on the choruses. 

I've been sending out press releases this month for the newest releases, and Darryl Sterdan of The Tinnitist has been kind enough to include some of the songs in his playlists.  You can find "Cheekbones And Legs" here:  You can find "Rub My Arm" here:  I really like his playlists because they expose me to stuff I'd never stumble across otherwise.  I've already found a few artists that I've checked out further on Spotify, and I know next time I don't know what to listen to, I'm going to be checking out Darryl's playlists because I'm sure to find something cool.  Thanks, Darryl!

If you want to hear more music, then listen to the first Yeast? 7"!

And, speaking of Yeast?, here's some bonus Yeast? for you!

Friday, April 22, 2022

Governor's Names On Highway Signs Update For 2022 Ohio Gubernatorial Primary Election


Over the years, I've always shook my head every time I drive into Ohio from Pennsylvania on I-80.  You see, driving into Pennsylvania, one gets greeted by a pleasant welcome to Pennsylvania sign, which has a motto of pursuing your happiness or something.  Then when I drive back into Ohio, the Ohio sign tells me whom the governor and lieutenant governor are.

I don't care.  Neither does any other motorist, I suspect.  It's just a waste of taxpayer money that provides free advertising for career politicians and appeals to their egos.  There's no reason for Ohio taxpayers to pay thousands of dollars for that.  Yet they do.  When last I checked, it cost $25,000 or so to do this nonsense (and that's not counting all the little mayors who emulate this practice and stick their names on the welcome signs for their cities--that also should be ended).  You can read an earlier post on the subject here (it also has links to earlier posts):  

Since it's another gubernatorial election year here in Ohio, I reached out to the candidates to see how they stood on the issue.  The results are dismal as usual, suggesting that Ohio will continue to be badly led whomever wins.  If candidates ignore voters at the time when they are most in need of voters, one knows they'll be ignoring the citizens while in office.  I had one candidate respond, and it was just the classic "Good point.  Let me think about that."  But, hey, that's light years ahead of everyone else.  For this election, I just focused on the Democratic and Republican candidates since the independent candidates can be dealt with in the summer or fall as the general election comes up (the deadline for them to register isn't even until the day before the primary election and none of the minor parties seem to be having a contest).  And, along those lines, why does the public have to pay for what are essentially intraparty elections?  The parties should pay for those elections on their own and not the taxpayers.  This article from last year has an interesting look at the issue:  The writer's solution is wrong, however.  One can dispense with the primary election entirely.  There's no reason for taxpayers to pay for dragging out the electoral process. 

So, first the Dems.  These cats essentially have no hope in Ohio in 2022, so they're running maybe to build name recognition for a Congressional seat down the road maybe or hoping the Repub nominee will run such a bad campaign that they can squeak in.  

First, there's John Cranley.  This dude at least had an email for contact on his website.  He didn't respond, of course, but that puts him ahead of his opponent, Nan Whaley, whom I had to contact via a YouTube comment.  Nan clearly doesn't care to hear from voters, so on that basis I have to hope that Cranley wins.  Given that Whaley's video only had 921 views on YouTube after being up for a month, you'd think she'd be excited to get any comment on it (personally, I'd be stoked about 921 views on one of my videos, but I'm not running for governor).  Both seem to be running terrible campaigns anyway.  I'm currently registered as a Democrat, and I don't think I've received a single piece of mail from either candidate.  Way to turn out the vote, guys!

That's fine.  I'll likely be registering as a Republican this time just to vote against DeWine, the current governor (I'm really an independent but if the parties are going to run their primary elections on the public dime, then they'll have to put up with people like me popping in and having my say on them), who combines the worst of blue and red since he panics about the virus just like the Dems and then has to prove how Repub he is by making women bury their abortion fetuses.  DeWine's name is up on the signs, so I didn't bother contacting him, assuming he is not going to be in favor of losing his taxpayer funded campaign signs.  Unfortunately, my guess is that DeWine will win again since he has so many primary opponents that the vote against him will be split and in 2022 it is unlikely for a Dem to win statewide in Ohio (or anywhere, given Biden's unpopularity).  So I contacted his three opponents.  Only Joe Blystone's campaign responded.  Even with the classic stall response, he still stands out as the best since he, you know, actually responded to a voter.  Jim Renacci probably has the best chance of unseating DeWine, but the tanned guy who looks like a used car salesman even had the wrong election date on the email he sent me (he threw me on his fundraising email list instead of responding to my question).  I replied to let them know to fix the date, but they didn't respond to that either.  Good luck, dude!  You'll need it.  In 2018, Cordray, who ended up being the Democratic nominee, also had simple dumb typo type stuff plaguing him (for example, the email address he had listed on his website was wrong) and ended up losing, so making elementary mistakes is usually a good way to lose.  The last Republican candidate, Ron Hood, also didn't respond.  I'm not even sure why he's in the race.  He appears to just be someone who likes to run for public office.  He's not even likely to be enough of a factor to split the vote.  Like the Dems, maybe he's just trying to improve his statewide recognition, so he can run for auditor down the road or something.

So from the primary perspective, things look grim for getting rid of those dang names on the highway signs.  Maybe Blystone will pull off a miracle and then pull off a bigger miracle by pulling off those signs.  Anyway, I'll try to check in with the candidates on the general election later this year, but if you want to help, then you can contact these boneheads as well (or even better your state rep. or city council person to band this practice in your state or city or, even better, both) and let them know we're tired of paying for inflating the egos of politicians.  Also, in the meantime, you know, I can't specifically encourage anyone to do the dangerous and illegal action of say replacing either DeWine's or Husted's name with that of Satan Tortilla (pictured above) or something, but I sure would have a smile on my face if next time I drive into Ohio on I-80, some graffiti artist had done just that.

Do you fantasize about pooping on the heads of egotistical politicians?  If so, you may want to seek some mental health help, or, better yet, read my latest novel, Fast Guy Slows Down, in which a character does just that!

Oh, and here's some soundtrack music for when you're asking the politicians to stop wasting out money:

Wednesday, April 20, 2022

"The Little Squirrel And The Baby Eagle" On New Pop Lit!

New Pop Lit published a short story of mine entitled "The Little Squirrel And The Baby Eagle" as one of their special projects, so thanks to them!  The story was inspired by a cute little fellow who showed up last year.  I first noticed him (or her, or if he's a nonbinary squirrel, then them) last year.  He looked like a cross between a squirrel and chipmunk (you can see him at the base of the tree in the picture).  I still don't know what he was/is, but he didn't seem to fit exactly any of the descriptions of local squirrels, so maybe he is a mule equivalent of a squirrel and chipmunk getting it on.  Who knows?  If so, he can reproduce because we had like 5 running around the yard last year.  For little guys, they were pretty tough and would chase the bigger squirrels away from their territory.  Unfortunately for the little squirrels, some eagles and hawks moved into the neighborhood and since then the big squirrel can hang out in the yard all day unmolested because there are no more little squirrels to chase him away.  I hope the cute little fellows just found an area with two black walnut trees to harvest instead of just one and moved away to there, but I fear they more likely ended up in the belly of an eagle.  Thus, this short story.

For more Wred Fright fiction, read my latest novel, Fast Guy Slows Down!

And, as a bonus, here's some Yeast? for you!:

Tuesday, April 19, 2022

New Recording!: "(I'm Going To) Youngstown (To Get Fucked Up)"

Severe Platter Damage included rerecordings of songs from 1990-1994, basically The Escaped Fetal Pigs and Yeast? eras with some assorted side projects mixed in.  My next album, What's Your Flow Setting, Baby?, covers rerecordings of songs from 1996-2014, basically The GoGoBots and early Wred Fright solo eras with some assorted side projects thrown in.  It's named for a question that users of supplemental oxygen have to answer concerning what level of oxygen flow they have to use to get their blood oxygen levels up to normal.  This first rerecorded song dates from 1996.  I wrote it while the proto-GoGoBots were getting rolling.  We were called The Hot Glue Guns back then (we changed because we liked the name The GoGoBots better--the band had the same lineup basically, though we might have added another guitarist around that same point).  This was one of the earliest songs I wrote for the new band.  Bruce Springsteen had just released a depressing, weepy song about Youngstown, Ohio USA, and while one could certainly find must to weep about where Y-Town is concerned, Youngstown was actually the place my friends and I went for fun (yes, New Castle, Pennsylvania USA, where we were from, was so boring that Youngstown--the locale Springsteen, even before he completely lost it and started hanging out and doing a podcast with a guy who loved bombing people with drones, found depressing--was considered a good time), so I wrote a song about Y-Town decadence.  It was one of our more popular tunes and was the one that caught the attention of the guys in Dink, one of whom, Sean Carlin, was nice enough to lend his time and major label equipment to record us (that resulted in the Noise Prescription cd).  Team Fright later played it as I did solo, so it's been a staple of the set for a long time.  The counting in Japanese at the beginning comes from karate practice.  Also, please don't hit people in the face with beer bottles.  That's not very nice.  For the rerecording, I played the usual instruments and sang.  I think I played around with stereo recording on this one and a few others before I learned again that splitting the signal just makes the sound lower unless one doubles the tracks which kind of defeats the point of splitting the signal into stereo.  Later tracks on this album return to mono (look for about one track a week coming up until I'll collect it as my sophomore slump album).  The tinny metal percussion is me beating on a metal file folder holder, a homage to Youngstown's historical steel industry, some remnants of which remain, as well as to the local bands such as The Infidels whom I used to go see at Cedar's and The Penguin Pub.  The Pub is long gone, though it looks as if Cedar's is surviving in a different location.  One of the bands, As Big As Love (who actually were from Western PA if I remember correctly), used to bang on a pipe on stage for their "big song", the name of which escapes me now, so the metal on the track continues this literal metal (not just the heavy metal genre, as this is more industrial/punk, though that's cool as well) tradition.  I also had fun playing around with the Audacity effects on these tracks.  This one has a Skrillexesque bassdrop on it for fun (maybe that's not the exact term, but you'll know what I'm talking about when you hear it).  Anyway, as usual, revisiting this stuff on my own is fun.  If Machine Gun Kelly is ever hard up for material, this would be a good cover for him.

If you want to hear more music, then listen to the first Yeast? 7"!

And, speaking of Yeast?, here's some bonus Yeast? for you!

Friday, April 15, 2022

Severe Platter Damage on Bandcamp!


Severe Platter Damage is now on Bandcamp at  It is also still available for listening at SoundCloud as well.  I am working on getting it on Spotify and whatnot, so stay tuned.  With luck, you can hear the album on your favorite streaming service soon.  The liner notes are still at, though the Bandcamp edition already includes them for those who buy the album as a download.

Next week should see the first single from the new album, so stay tuned there as well.  I'm getting into the songs from 1995 on now, so the new album covers the songs in the set still from The GoGoBots and early Wred Fright solo eras.  They will probably appear on SoundCloud first and then, once collected as the album, probably elsewhere if things go well distributing Severe Platter Damage in a more conventional manner.  There are no plans for release on vinyl, cassette, or cd, but if you really are into those formats, you could send me a blank cassette or cd-r and a self-addressed stamped envelope, and I'd make one for you if you asked nicely.  For vinyl, you'd have to ask some record company to contact me to acquire the vinyl rights and press them because I still have a few copies of a record from 1994 that I'm trying to find good homes for, and I don't want another box of vinyl hanging around the house. Ditto for 8-track I suppose if anyone still does new versions of those.  For booking inquiries, get in touch, but the live performances are just me and an electric guitar, so it won't sound much like the album (unless you want to hire a backing band for me).

And, speaking of bands, here's a bonus Yeast? track for you:     

Wednesday, April 13, 2022

The Return Of Anal Spikemobile!

I am still clearing room on the main SoundCloud page, so Anal Spikemobile is next to graduate to their own page, which you can find here:  I wrote about the album in a previous post.  Listening to it remains a trip and cracks me up.  If you want to download the original track, it's still up for the moment at, but whether you download it from the old page or the new page, I would download it if you like it, as Internet music sites have a tendency to disappear (though the original track has been up since 2013, which is an impressive run, so SoundCloud must be doing something right).  I like the description on the new page of the band:  "Anal Spikemobile was a band from Pennsylvania/Ohio USA who terrorized audiences in the early 1990s."

That about sums it up.  Dave and I did some crazy stuff live.  One time we played from different sides of the room (The Gargoyle in Warren, Ohio USA if I remember correctly, which was very tolerant of our various musical projects).  Another time, though it may not have been Anal Spikemobile officially (Maybe Rage Against Dabney Coleman? I don't remember), we opened for The Entombed and scared their tough metalhead audience (I kept swinging out into the crowd with a long microphone line--somehow we didn't get into a fistfight with anyone; I think a couple of them even said they liked us).  So if you're listening to this nuttiness on the recording, then imagine what it was like live.  Fortunately, we didn't play out often; otherwise, we might not have survived.  In any case, it was a far cry from today's shows, where people are asked to show their vaccine passports and usually just stare at their cellphones instead of watching the band, and the band's more worried about extending their brand on social media than they are about rocking out.  Let's hope the times get cooler and to do that let's be cooler ourselves.  A good start is to rev up The Spikemobile and take it for a drive here!

For a more conventional but still fun listen to music by these musicians, listen to the Yeast? 7"!

And, speaking of Yeast?, here's a bonus for you:

Tuesday, April 12, 2022

New Single!: Rub My Arm

This song was cobbled together from four song ideas that individually probably wouldn't have been as strong as this one.  The first one was from observing young people getting drunk early in the morning on St. Patrick's Day (I would think one would have to be drunk already to think kegs and eggs was a good idea, but apparently that's not the case).  I remember one time I was driving to work on the morning of St. Patrick's Day and stopped at a red light when one young woman crossed the street in front of me pausing merely to puke in the crosswalk before moving on.  That was over two decades ago.  She's probably somebody's middleaged mom now, and I would hope she isn't yakking in the street at 8 a.m. anymore.  

The second idea came from just seeing an attractive woman very excited about her new Hyundai and thinking about how vehicles are used as status symbols.  If she were a man, she'd probably have to have more than a Hyundai to impress someone, but since she's a woman she could be in a junker and some dude would still be hitting on her (but hopefully not actually hitting her and ending up in a car accident--not a good way to meet someone).

The third idea came from just picking up one too many bad albums at the library by an established band and wondering why they would tarnish their legacy with work that's clearly substandard.  Playing music is fun, but it's just sad when people get locked into it and have to knowingly release crap just to pay the mortgage/rent.  They'd probably be happier just changing careers, but I guess once you've been a rock star, it's hard to spend time in a cubicle or something.

The fourth idea just came from watching how lovers give off signals when they want to leave an event, say a party, and spend some quality time alone.  Usually inebriated, one partner usually starts rubbing the other partner's arm and sometimes starts rubbing her or his whole body up against the partner's.  Even if one is having a good time at the event, that's a hard signal to ignore.

Musically, it's the usual guitar, keyboard bass, vocals, and drums.  For the weird instrument this time, I just "rubbed" the microphone.  You can hear that most clearly at the beginning and ending of the track, though an amplified version of the rubbing provides most of the rhythm for the third input.

This might be one of those songs that other people like more than I do, so it might hang around in the set longer than it would otherwise.  And, speaking of sets, when the hey are you going to invite me over and feed me and have me play you a set?

You don't even have to rub my arm.

Unless you're a honey in a Hyundai.

Lyrics are below:

Those young drunks stumbling around
On St. Patrick's Day
Will someday be parents
And not so much fun
As when they were young and dumb

Rub my arm with
Both your hands
And tell me that you want to
Go home
Rub my arm with
Both your hands
And tell me that you want us
To be alone

I saw a honey in a Hyundai
So I bought myself a Ford
And she just said is that all you can afford?
So I got myself a Kia
And she just said, "See ya!"

You can keep your abundance of caution
I'm OK with some risk in my life
No one wants to hear your new album
Maybe find yourself another career
It's not too late to go back to college

For more Wred Fright music, listen to the Yeast? 7"!

And speaking of Yeast?, here's a Yeast? bonus for you:

Friday, April 8, 2022

New Yeast? Soundcloud Page!

I have to clear up some space on my SoundCloud page, so I will be deleting "Happy Tears" by Yeast?, so if you want to download it from there and have not done so yet, now would be the time.  I should also note that I heartily recommend downloading.  As cool as streaming services are, files can disappear at any time.  Yeast?, for example, probably was one of the earliest bands to have music online.  We started at the Internet Underground Music Archive or IUMA for short.  Here's a little article on what happened to them:  I don't remember what year the Yeast? files disappeared from IUMA, but they were up until a few years after the band itself was defunct.  Then I think I put up at least one Yeast? file on MySpace.  It disappeared along with the rest of MySpace, although this site claims to have some of the lost MySpace files:  I assume SoundCloud's files will disappear in some corporate merger or RAID failure, so enjoy it while it's there.  Ditto for any Yeast? stuff on YouTube or whatnot.  The same goes for any music you like.  Download it and back it up if you want to up the odds on enjoying listening to it in the future.  

Since I will be moving "Happy Tears" shortly, I set up a Yeast? page on SoundCloud, so you can find the track there, along with a few others.  As mentioned earlier, I recommend downloading the tracks if you like them.  I'll probably be featuring the tracks here in subsequent weeks.  Here's one to start:

While uploading these, I enjoyed listening to all the many other bands named Yeast on there.  That appears to remain a popular band name.  We might have been the second ones to use it.  There was a band on C/Z Records that appears to have been the first to use that name.  When we learned of them, it was too late to change the name, and they appeared to be defunct, so we just added a question mark to the name like Therapy? (we liked Therapy?; otherwise, we would probably have gone with an exclamation point or maybe even an interrobang).  After we called it a day, the floodgates broke open.  Some of them unfortunately are dreadful.  I remember some bonehead in the 1990s claiming we stole his band's name, which was hilarious because his Yeast formed after ours had broken up (apparently, he was too dumb to look up things on the then-current Ultimate Band List, but not dumb enough not to send a whiny email).  Over the years, there's been a screamo band, a weepy piano band, an electronic artist, and some indescribable (apparently, in Asia, people like to listen to just the audio of anime or something ?????).  It continues today.  Just plunk Yeast in at Soundcloud.  Of the new Yeasts, I like these guys the best, but it looks like they broke up in 2003.

If you want more Yeast?, then listen to our classic 1994 7" (not on the new SoundCloud page)!

Thursday, April 7, 2022

Print Edition Of Blog Love Omega Glee!

When I published Blog Love Omega Glee over a decade ago as an ebook, Amazon didn't have their print on demand counterpart for the Kindle, so the entire novel never appeared in print.  It did have some print appearances.  Go Metric published an excerpt.  I traded a zine version with a few fellow zine publishers.  Another excerpt appeared in Working Stiff, a professional wrestling literature anthology.  But if you wanted a print version, you had to print out the pdf itself.  A few years later, Amazon introduced their nifty print on demand service, so my next novel, Frequently Asked Questions About Being Dead, appeared as both an ebook and a print book.  I never went back to redo Blog Love Omega Glee as a print book.  I might have looked at it, and the novel was too long for what Amazon had available at the time (it is a really long novel); I don't remember.  As the novels piled up though, the absence of a print edition of one of the novels became more obvious (the other exception is an ebook version of The Pornographic Flabbergasted Emus, but there actually is an electronic version available; you just have to know where to look--think of it as an Internet scavenger hunt), and I started looking into getting a print version.  Well, I am happy to announce that effort was successful, and Amazon now has a print version of Blog Love Omega Glee available.  It costs twice as much as the other paperbacks of my novels do, but that's because it's not much shorter than the print versions of the other three novels available through Amazon's print on demand combined.  It came in at the exact page limit of Amazon's print on demand service at 828 pages (as I mentioned earlier, it's a long novel).  I had to make some formatting shifts to make it fit such as running the chapters immediately after one another, but overall it came out pretty well.  I am curious to see the final product in person myself.  I also found a couple dang typos while doing the formatting and fixed them in the ebooks (you can find the free ebooks here:  pdf and epub).  They're pretty minor, so maybe no one else but myself would notice or care, but I figured I'd fix them anyway.  I didn't update the editions on Amazon, Google Books, Smashwords, or whatnot because that always opens up the proverbial can of worms (see my discussion of getting Fast Guy Slows Down through the strange Smashwords hurdles), but if you have one of those and you are a completist, the solution is to just download one of the free pay what you want versions and not pay since you already paid through one of the corporate booksellers (I'm not quite sure why anyone orders that novel through them anyway, but some people have their preferred vendors); you can make it another scavenger hunt to see what the typos were (only if you're really, really bored, I imagine).  It was fun to revisit Blog Love Omega Glee though, and I was glad to see that the novel and the humor holds up.  Unfortunately, it looks like we're all living in a world much closer to its dystopia now; I would have preferred not being so prophetic (of course, when a novel is set in 2012, that might not be the best word, but I suspect you know what I mean).

Tuesday, April 5, 2022

Last Week On The Stack

Last week on my Substack, I published two pieces.  The first was "Grop The Neanderthal Announces Bid For Senate" and the second was "How To Do A Hollywood Celebrity Twitter Account By Howard Ibe Trans, Social Media Consultant".  

Yes, since there is no equivalent now to the National Lampoon of the 1970s, I have to do it myself apparently.  It's been fun experimenting with The Stack.  More will come this week.  To get it emailed to you, just sign up here:  Half of the stuff is public, so it's free.  The other half you'll have to pay for, which is good because then that frees up time from work and gives me more time to write silly stuff for you, but you can subscribe for free and get the free stuff if you're having budget problems.  And, of course, as usual, the blog will be featuring stuff.  More music is coming up, with luck some more drinkdrankdrunk, probably another tale from the virus panic, and it is, of course, time for our quadrennial attempt to get those darn governors' names off the highway signs in Ohio.

If you need something to read while you're waiting, I suggest Fast Guy Slows Down!

Friday, April 1, 2022

New Single!: Cheekbones And Legs

This song was inspired by older folks who watch a lot of television and get crushes on the tv personalities.  One of my friends researched this one-way relationship/friendship, and it was quite interesting.  Basically, a lot of the needs that drive friendships/romantic relationships are fulfilled.  It's probably not as healthy or fulfilling as a real romantic relationship or a real friendship, but it certainly seems to avoid the pitfalls of when those sour (and an actor on a tv show will live forever in reruns even after the real person who played the role has died, so the parasocial relationship never has to end in some cases).  On the other end, it is probably quite strange to get recognized in the supermarket by all these people you don't know just because you give the weather on the tv news or something.  Ultimately though, no matter how much viewers think they know someone, they really don't.  The relationship with a tv person (who is usually young and attractive) is just being used to sell products like used cars and eggs.  Musically, I sang and played guitar, drums, and keyboard bass.  For the weird sounds, I made a drum track go backwards (you can hear this most clearly on the third input), and doubletracked the vocals on the choruses.  The lyrics are below.

Frank hasn't left the house all day because it's looking kind of gray.
He turns on the tv set to see what the new weathergirl has to say.
She's so nice.  She's one of his best friends.
She's so pretty he doesn't care if it rains.
When she's on he forgets all his pains.
In his heart, the spinning starts on the weathervanes.

Cheekbones and legs.
Selling used cars and eggs.

Mary's so glad to be done with work.
Why does everyone have to be such a jerk?
On the tv, everyone laughs and gets along.
In reality, her boss is no Captain Kirk.
Lock the doors and turn the television on.
She won't think about work again until the dawn.
It's just her and her friends on tv
where the people are better-looking, she thinks as she yawns.

And it's a parasocial relationship.
They all think they know me, but they don't know shit.
They just see me on tv,
and that ain't reality.
They know me, but I don't know them.
I don't want to; I just smile and pretend
and act like I'm their friend,
the one they have in their head.

For more Wred Fright music, listen to the Yeast? 7"!