Monday, March 14, 2022

Tales From The Virus Panic #5: "Hollywood Celebrities United For Big Pharma"

A minor Hollywood celebrity testified to Congress via Zoom.  The Congressional Representative wet her panties with glee as she introduced him over her brush, albeit over the Internet, with fame.  He implored everyone to get vaccinated against the virus.  Months later after the vaccines he promoted were widely revealed to be neither "safe" nor "effective", as they failed to prevent the Omicron variant from spreading and racked up more reports on the Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System than any other vaccines in the system's decades' long history, he still, before hosting another awards show where Hollywood pats itself on the back, called the unvaccinated, "dipshits".

Meanwhile, the highest daily case rate of the virus panic was on a day over a year after the vaccines had been introduced, with the graph shooting straight vertical and looking like a rocket taking off, almost quadrupling any previous high.

A Hollywood talk show host suggested that anyone who didn't get vaccinated shouldn't be treated in a hospital.

Meanwhile, more people died from the virus in the year after the vaccines were used than in the year before they were used.

A popular disc jockey hoped the unvaccinated would die so they wouldn't infect him with the virus.

Meanwhile, the vaccinated died (typically, "mysteriously", "suddenly", or "unexpectedly") and were injured from side-effects brought on by the vaccine, but that coverage was left far from the glossy pages of mainstream magazines and fancy big tech websites, with only the conspiracy theorists on the edges of the Internet and family and friends of the fallen connecting the dots.

A comedian canceled shows where the venues would not demand proof of vaccination to attend because he wanted to protect the public from the virus, drawing from the erroneous belief that only the unvaccinated could spread it.  Maybe he only wanted to protect himself from an unvaccinated heckler's thrown beer bottle since the unvaccinated are the only demographic in America that comedians feel comfortable making fun of anymore.

Meanwhile, a comedian bragging about being vaccinated collapsed on stage and fractured her skull.  Let's have a big hand for the vaccine injured, folks!

A popular action movie star said his fear of death was more important than the freedom of others to live their lives without being injected with an experimental drug whose long-term effects were unknown and told them to "screw your freedom".

Meanwhile, Wall Street began to rapidly sell off the stock of the vaccine companies.  One company's stock price dropped from its high months earlier of $484 to $130, as investors feared that even the liability protections the company had wrestled from lawmakers wouldn't be enough to shield it from future injury and wrongful death lawsuits.

An actress dropped all her unvaccinated friends and bragged about it to a gossip magazine.

Meanwhile, a soccer team started discriminating against its vaccinated players because of what its owner claimed were their weakened performances.

A talk show host said that people should be forced by the government to get the vaccinations.

Meanwhile, a few weeks later, she got her booster shot, didn't feel well (though it was claimed she was just using "an abundance of caution" after being exposed to someone with the virus), and took some time off from the show.  Before she could return, she caught the virus and had to miss the show some more.  Yet she insisted that people should get vaccinated, perhaps feverish enough from the virus that she was unable to think logically, though that same illogic seems to be a character trait of her overall.

A burned out hippie musician demanded that a music service either remove his music or remove a podcaster who had guests that dissented from the corporate, governmentally-sanctioned, mainstream view of the virus panic (what the musician labeled "misinformation").

Meanwhile, the gigantic equity group that invested in the company that owned some of the rights to the musician's music (he had sold out, man, long ago; "This (Promissory) Note's For You", dude!) owned an even larger stake in pharmaceutical companies that benefited from the vaccines since they also developed RNA-based medications, though when critics blew back charges of hypocrisy at the musician, he insisted that it was fine since the equity group technically had their investment in a different fund of the music company, though he oddly conceded that the optics looked bad with a former C.E.O. of one of the pharmaceutical companies that made the vaccine now leading the advisory board of the equity group, then he suggested we buy his new album on vinyl because it sounds better that way.  

A casting director skips casting an actress because she heard that the actress is anti-vax, and she doesn't want to work with people like that.

Meanwhile, the pharmaceutical companies spend a lot of money advertising in the media.

A major Hollywood star said unvaccinated people were selfish and cowardly, afraid of getting a shot in the arm.  Then, he got another Botox injection, explaining why he was comfortable with people injecting toxins into their bodies.

Meanwhile, the internal Democratic polling showed that unless they lifted virus panic restrictions they would be out of power (probably for a generation if they can't make everyone forget Joe Biden), so they started rapidly lifting restrictions claiming, "the science had changed".

Few Hollywood celebrities apparently bother to critically think and examine data, choosing to side with the rich and powerful interests who pay their salaries and fund their luxurious lifestyles.  The sick and dying, injured by the celebrities' pompous pronouncements about things they know little about, just aren't very photogenic, alas.  As Upton Sinclair once noted, "It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends upon his not understanding it!"

Meanwhile, the rest of us should stop watching and listening to these selfish, foolish people who don't seem to know anything other than knowing how to read lines from teleprompters from scripts written by paranoid public health officials and greedy pharmaceutical executives.

This is a work of fiction, but it's based on real incidents.  Here are some links to source material:

If you need some entertainment that doesn't reverse Walt Whitman and "horrify slaves and cheer up despots", then please read my latest novel, Fast Guy Slows Down.

1 comment:

  1. When I wrote this, I didn't know that The Oscars were sponsored by Pfizer/BioNTech. That just underscores everything here, eh?


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