Blog Love Omega Glee: Another Shameless Commercial Disguised As a Chapter (14 October 2012)

In his dream, Jake is on a quest to buy a net at the end of a long pole like the kind used by swimming pool cleaners or butterfly collectors, so that he can catch the wild parrots flying around the discount store he works at. He's trying to decide if the donut store might sell them when he hears a loud banging from the engine of the semi truck he's driving for the errand, and then he wakes up and he's in his bed in his room and his sister is knocking at the door, saying, "Mom says if you don't wake up and come and eat breakfast, she's going to declare you legally dead."

"All right, all right, I'm coming," Jake says, and throws a pillow at the door.

"Five minutes or we put you on a milk carton," Winifred says, muffled through the door, and he hears her go away.

Jake gets out of bed and retrieves the pillow. He considers going back to sleep, but he was getting a bit worried about where he would find a net at the end of a long pole anyway, so he scratches his head, then his ass, and stumbles downstairs in his Waffle Warrior pajamas.

His dad and sister are at the dining room table reading among the remnants of breakfast. He kisses them each on the cheek good morning and pulls up a chair, "Where's Mom?"

"On the computer, as usual," Dad says, "I never get to play blackjack on there anymore."

"She made breakfast though since I was home," Winifred says, drumming her fingers on the book she's reading, The Pornographic Flabbergasted Emus, "It's in the oven for you."

Dad yawns so loudly the birds outside get startled and start flying south again. He picks up part of the newspaper and says, "Well, time to make another deposit in the First National Bank of Shit."

"Gross!" Winifred says, as Dad chuckles and heads out of the room, "I don't know how you can live with them, Jake. They get nuttier every time I come home."

Jake stands up to get his food, "What are you doing her anyway? Weren't you just here a couple of weeks ago?"

"I'm visiting early this month because I have a date next weekend and it's Halloween the weekend after that."

"Isn't Halloween on a Wednesday or something this year?"

"Yes, so? It isn't like someone's going to throw a Halloween party in November."

Jake comes back from the kitchen with a plate of toast, eggs, and bacon, "Good point."

"So what were you doing so late last night? Francine?"

"Funny. No, she was working as usual. I went out with North. He was depressed because his girlfriend dumped him again. She found someone who made more money, so I got to listen to him rant for hours about how women are whores."

"And he wonders why he has trouble finding a date. Tell him, men are worse. At least women don't dump guys for younger models."

"Models like fashion models, or models like car models?" Jake says, dangling a piece of bacon over his mouth.

"Does it matter?'

"Good point," Jake says and swallows the bacon, chewing with his mouth open to irritate his sister.

"Gross. So what have you been up to beside forgetting table manners?"

After he's swallowed the bacon, Jake says, "Don't tell Mom and Dad, but I might be moving out."

"What?" Mom says, coming into the dining room.

Blog Love Omega Glee is a novel by Wred Fright about two bloggers who fall in love while the world falls apart, which is being serialized on his blog. To start reading from the beginning or read another installment, please visit Blog Love Omega Glee Central on WredFright.Com. If you like what you've read, or you've read all of Blog Love Omega Glee and want more Fright, then please read his first novel.