Blog Love Omega Glee: Bloggers, Politicians, And Reptiles (21 August 2012)

Francine's scoop that Congressional Representative George George met with the newly-named campaign manager of the rival party's presidential campaign has caused a minor furor in the blogosphere which spilled into what's left of the mainstream media. The storm lasted about an hour in the news cycle and then was forgotten in the stampede of the latest scandal (a male senator came out as a crossdresser and gave his speech at the convention wearing a designer dress, pearls, and a wig--no one can remember what he talked about but he looked fabulous). However, the next day Francine still tunes into a news conference online to see what Vice-President Clinton, who supposedly brokered the meeting out of bitterness that hip-hop diva and current governor of California Frizkee Dallas was Senator Polipo's choice for running mate instead of herself, has to say.

Clinton, who wears a navy blue pantsuit, greets a phalanx of reporters, their microphones and cameras raised like hunters approaching prey.

There is much shouting, but the commotion dies down as Clinton begins to speak, "Good afternoon. I'd like to thank all of you for attending and for giving me the opportunity to clarify a few things. As you know, there have been a lot of rumors in the past day or so and I'd like to set things straight. You see, we live in an age where anyone has access to publishing, which is wonderful, but unfortunately a number of individuals choose not to exercise that freedom responsibly. Not like you folks, who are responsible journalists and media professionals. I'm talking about bloggers who gossip and spread lies. Now this has always gone on, but in the past no one paid much attention to what some crazy person on a streetcorner mumbled to her or himself. But nowadays those same individuals have a megaphone in the form of the Internet and now we have to take their ramblings more seriously. So, I'd just like to ask all of you to come talk to me and my office before you spread information about me that's not true. I'll now entertain questions. Yes, you there."

"Where did you get your hair done? It looks great," a female reporter asks.

"Oh, thank you. You know I just had it done by my regular stylist. She's great and she always does a great job."

Another female reporter, shooting a sharp glance at the first, asks, "Well, it is true that your hair looks nice, I think a more important matter is did you really arrange a meeting between Congressional Representative George and Louis Carson Fir, and, if so, why? According to the initial report by the blogger, it was to promise the congressman financial support for his campaign if he would agree to vote for the president if the electoral college came to a tie and the House of Representatives had to choose the winner."

"That's ridiculous. Even George has said there was no such meeting. Next question."

A male reporter asks, "But George just admitted today that he did meet with Fir after some cell phone pictures of the two together at the restaurant leaked out. So there was a meeting. The question is did you arrange it?"

Clinton looks dismayed, "No. Next question."

Another male reporter, "Are you bitter that Polipo didn't pick you as his running mate?"

Clinton glares at the reporter, "Next question."

An androgynous reporter says, "The blogger of the initial report said that she didn't believe the reason that George gave her for the meeting. She stated that she saw the meeting as confirmation of the fact that the two party system is a masquerade and both sides work together in order to guarantee that people will not have a real choice in government, and that we live in a plutocracy that tries to keep the rest of the populace distracted and ignorant. What do you say to such an accusation?"

"I try not to encourage people in their mental illness so I say nothing. Next."

A female reporter: "After insisting that there was no such meeting, George finally conceded that he did meet with Fir, and now says that he only did it because you leaned on him to do so. Is that true?"

"No comment. One more question and then I'm afraid that I have to go," Clinton says as she looks at her watch, "As you know, vice-presidenting is a lot of work."

A male reporter, "Do you still think that, and I quote, 'George is a snake, the type of awful snake that would be served in one of those restaurants in China where they serve awful things such as snakes like George'?"

"I never said that."

"No, of course you didn't, but I did, and I thought it was accurate to how you felt," the reporter says.

Clinton looks upward, apparently thinking, then looks at the reporter and says, "OK, go ahead and quote me on that."

Blog Love Omega Glee is a novel by Wred Fright about two bloggers who fall in love while the world falls apart, which is being serialized on his blog. To start reading from the beginning or read another installment, please visit Blog Love Omega Glee Central on WredFright.Com. If you like what you've read, or you've read all of Blog Love Omega Glee and want more Fright, then please read his first novel, which is available in print and as an ebook.