Blog Love Omega Glee: A Coffeehouse Conversation About Whether Or Not God Believes In Us (8 August 2012)

"Uh, oh, Tom and Larry are here," Francine says, as she and Jake enter Caffeine Eden, "Do you want to go somewhere else?"

"It's Lackwood, there really isn't anywhere else to go," Jake says, looking around the coffeeshop, "Besides, there are plenty of open tables. We'll just sit as far away from them as possible."

Francine nods and they order coffee from Adam at the counter. Just as they're about to take a seat though, a horde of high school students pour in and take up all the tables except one: The one in the corner next to Tom and Larry.

"Dammit! I told you we should have gone somewhere else! I had a rough day; I don't know if I can listen to those two old men nattering on tonight," Francine says, the irritable tone in her voice rising like a rocket heading into space.

"Oh, it'll be all right. We haven't seen them in a while anyway. Besides I spent all day at the bank pretty much in silence so I probably won't mind their chatter for once," Jake says, heading to the table.

Francine grumbles, but follows. Tom and Larry don't seem to notice the couple's arrival since they're deep in a loud conversation of their own. " . . . I don't care what science says about The Big Bang. It had to come from somewhere. I think God farted, and that's what released all the cosmic gas that eventually came to be us," Larry says, shaking his coffee cup at Tom across the table.

Tom plays with his ear hair and pulls out some wax. He wipes it on a napkin. "Ah! I can hear better now. What were you saying, Larry?"

Larry replies in an even louder voice, "I think The Big Bang was God having a gas attack. He might have even been burping. It says in The Bible that 'In the beginning was the Word', but maybe it was just a sound and not really a word. Maybe it was a burp."

"So, in the beginning was the Burp?" Tom asks, "I don't know, Larry. Even if the scientists have trouble explaining the why and wherefore of The Big Bang, I think their explanation of the universe is better than saying some old guy made all of us. Ever since Ethel died, I've had trouble believing in God."

"Oh, Tom, that's not important. Whether you believe in God or not, God exists. The more important question is whether God believes in you."

"I can't believe this conversation," Francine says, gathering her things, and leaves.

Jake sits at the table. "Um," he says, watching Francine leave. Not knowing what to do, he takes a sip of coffee. In the background, Tom and Larry continue to debate metaphysics and whether or not the sale at Food Wigwam this week is a good one or not.

Blog Love Omega Glee is a novel by Wred Fright about two bloggers who fall in love while the world falls apart, which is being serialized on his blog. To start reading from the beginning or read another installment, please visit Blog Love Omega Glee Central on WredFright.Com. If you like what you've read, or you've read all of Blog Love Omega Glee and want more Fright, then please read his first novel, which is available in print and as an ebook.