What do you do when the world ends and you somehow survive? Or your world ends anyway, unexpectedly, all those daily dreams and hopes for the future, the vague plan you were following and which seemed to be unfolding before you, until it all ran into a mountain and shattered?
You go on, of course, a bit rattled, perhaps teetering from side to side on occasion, but time moves you along no matter how much you'd prefer to stand still and examine how things went wrong.
For Jake, this means that in the morning he gets up and does his usual fussing about and makes his way to work, where, as usual, he has plenty of time to stare at a tan cubicle wall. Here, he, in fact, gets his autopsy wish, for, setting aside his habitual reading, he stares at the wall and analyzes what happened to his relationship with Francine, which seemed, from his perspective at least, to be proceeding merrily merrily and gently and gently down the stream of life to Andtheylivedhappilyeverafterland. Instead, Jake realizes he had merely rowed himself a bit faster along a dream that ended near a waterfall where the relationship came crashing down on the rocks below and instead of living happily ever after, they all died miserably right then.
But worse than that, Jake thinks, idly twirling a paperclip through the fingers of his right hand and occasionally tapping it on the desk, how could he have once again ruined things? The woman of his dreams had once more kicked him awake and out of her life. First Jackson, now Francine. "What's wrong with me?" Jake wonders.
He goes down in the bathroom and looks in the mirror. The usual head and body greet him in the mirror. Jake remains fond of the way he looks: Dark hair, proportioned face, the cute little mole on his cheek that he sometimes worries will turn cancerous, and so forth. He has all his limbs even! Just like everyone else does of themselves, Jake thinks of himself as above average in every way.
Maybe it is his personality? No, he tries to be nice to everyone. He can't think of where he went wrong with Francine.
Maybe it was her?
No, that would imply that Jake had bad judgment in getting involved with her in the first place.
Maybe the fact that he's unemployed?
Hmm . . . Francine doesn't come across as very materialistic, but maybe deep down she craves a provider in an evolutionary psychology sort of way.
However, she did once tell him that evolutionary psychology was all masculinist bullshit.
Jake's stomach sinks as he turns away from the bathroom mirror and leaves the restroom. Perhaps it was his interest in wrestling that drove her away?
No, she knew that about him from the beginning so it couldn't have been that.
Hmm . . . although what might have first seemed quirky and cool might have upon longer exposure come across as juvenile and obsessive.
Maybe he should give up on wrestling or he might have to give up on women.
Maybe he should try to win back Francine somehow and convince her that he really does love her. How could he do that?
Well, considering that today is his last day of the temp job, maybe getting a job might be a good start, Jake decides.
He'll work his way up to weaning himself off wrestling . . . or women. Unless he can find a nice woman wrestler. He wonders if North knows any.
"No," he sighs as he sits down at his desk, "I miss Francine."
His emotions are in a crossface chickenwing, but he's not going to tap out just yet.
Blog Love Omega Glee is a novel by Wred Fright about two bloggers who fall in love while the world falls apart, which is being serialized on his blog. To start reading from the beginning or read another installment, please visit Blog Love Omega Glee Central on WredFright.Com. If you like what you've read, or you've read all of Blog Love Omega Glee and want more Fright, then please read his first novel, which is available in print and as an ebook.
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