After his first day working at the bank, Jake drops by Francine's house. He rings the doorbell and Francine answers. "Well, aren't you cute all dressed up in your little suit and tie?" she says and kisses him.
Jake loosens the tie as he steps inside and says, "I think I only really need the tie tomorrow. The suit jacket was probably a bit overkill, but I wanted to make a good impression."
"So, how was it? Did the Federal Reserve order you to drink the blood of poor infants or anything?" Francine says, as they take a seat in the living room, "Speaking of that, do you want something to drink? Though I'm afraid we do not have any infant blood to offer you, banking man."
"Ha!" Jake laughs, "No, everyone seemed quite normal. I didn't even have to do much today, just proofread a couple newspaper ads. I'm going to bring a book to read tomorrow so I don't get bored as I don't know how much I can get away with surfing the Web. Maybe I can borrow a long novel from Masani. In the meantime, a cup of tea sounds grand."
"She should be home soon, and I'll make us all some tea right now," Francine says and gets up.
After Francine goes to the kitchen, Jake roots through the publications on the coffeetable. He settles on one called The Conspiracy Chronicle, which is a photocopied newsletter. The lead story is about how a sinister cabal is pressing for one world government by fomenting global economic and political chaos and fanning fear over global warming problems and disease epidemics that respect no national border. Their plan is that as a result of all this manufactured craziness that people will clamor for a world government to replace their inefficient national governments, which will make it easier for these criminal elites to control things. As an example of this phenomenon, the writer, Cleon Pinker, notes that the current shortage of puppy dogs, blamed on chemicals in the water supply that have feminized male dogs in recent years so that their sperm count has dropped like they drop to leave a turd in the grass while on a walk, has in truth, in plain truth as Herbert W. Armstrong would put it, been genetically engineered so that the whining of children who want a puppy but can't get one due to the puppy shortage will provoke their parents into whining to their governments that they need a one world government so that problems such as the puppy shortage can be resolved in the most cost-effective and efficient way possible: Through The United States Of Earth.
Yes, now government too will offer deep discount savings never before possible. How will they do it? Volume, volume, volume!
When Francine comes back into the living room, Jake drops the newsletter back on the coffeetable and says, "I don't know how you can read stuff like this. Those people are paranoid. Everything's a sinister plot. Us having tea right now is probably a plan of the New World Order."
Francine sits down next to him on the orange couch, and says, "Well, what you call being paranoid, I call being well-informed."
"But the guy in that newsletter wrote that the shortage of puppies is a plot to bring about one world government. That's ridiculous. What's next? Aliens abducting kitty cats?"
"Hey, I don't hassle you about watching large sweaty men in tights touching one another as entertainment, so lay off my choice of reading material. I like conspiracy theorists because half the time they're right and half the time they're so wrong it's funny," Francine says, standing up in a huff, as well as standing up in her living room at the same time, though please do not apply mathematical logic to assume that a huff is a living room as that would be incorrect.
Jake grabs her hand, "I'm sorry, Francine. I shouldn't have said anything. I'm probably just grumpy because I'm hungry."
He stands and pulls Francine to him and they embrace.
"However, I have heard some stories about cats and UFOs," she says, smiling, as they break away when she hears the kettle whistling, and Jake laughs.
As she heads into the kitchen, Francine thinks that the water may be boiling but the relationship may be cooling off.
Blog Love Omega Glee is a novel by Wred Fright about two bloggers who fall in love while the world falls apart, which is being serialized on his blog. To start reading from the beginning or read another installment, please visit Blog Love Omega Glee Central on WredFright.Com. If you like what you've read, or you've read all of Blog Love Omega Glee and want more Fright, then please read his first novel, which is available in print and as an ebook.
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