"This damn new solar heating grill is going to take all day to cook these burgers, isn't it?" Jake's dad says, squinting in the afternoon sunlight in the backyard, slapping at the grill with a spatula while watching a crow in a nearby tree, "I should have never let your mother talk me into buying it."
"Fred, it's fine. It only feels like it's taking a long time because you're fussing over it," Jake's mom says, handing a glass of lemonade to Francine, who sits quietly in a lawn chair, "Don't stand so close to it either or you'll get a sunburn from the reflection."
"I think a magnifying glass would be faster," Dad grumbles, walking away from the curved mirrored grill.
Walking up behind her, Jake whispers to Francine, "Welcome to a typical holiday with the Falls," then says to his father, "Did you remember to put a veggie burger on for me, Dad?"
Dad disappears into the house, mumbling about "people who have to be difficult and just can't eat what everyone else is eating."
Mom follows him, "Excuse me, kids, but he'll never find the veggie burgers on his own. I better show him where they are before he gets all upset."
Francine and Jake both sigh. "Well, I think they like you. If they didn't, Dad would have complained about you already," Jake says, sitting down in the lawn chair next to Francine.
"Meeting someone's parents is definitely the worst thing about dating someone," Francine says, "But this is almost pleasant. It's like they're putting on a comedy show for me."
"Nope, that's just how they are. Enjoy it while you can. Soon it will drive you crazy. In any case, I'm glad you came today. Yesterday was pretty weird."
"Oh, it was just a typical lovers' quarrel."
"Careful, you used the word 'love' there."
Francine hits him playfully in the arm with her book, an attractive, trim, red paperback.
"What are you reading?" Jake asks, "I think I've seen that book before."
Francine looks at the book, The Pornographic Flabbergasted Emus, "Oh, some silly novel about a rock band. I had started it, but then something happened that took up a lot of my time, so I never finished it. Do you know what/who that something/someone was/is?"
Jake smiles and they lean in and kiss.
Coming out the side door, Jake's mom catches a glimpse of the smoocherooni and says, "Ah, young love."
Francine drops back into her chair and says, "Sorry!"
Mom puts on her sunglasses and says, "You don't have to apologize. I remember what it was like. Isn't that right, Fred?"
Dad, coming out the door with a veggie burger on a plate, says, "I don't know what you're talking about."
A loud boom sounds nearby. Dad shudders and drops the plate. The burger plummets into the grass.
"Oh, no, better get Jake another one," Mom says.
Dad bends down and picks up the burger and plops it on the plate, which survived the fall intact. He picks some grass off it, "What? It's just some grass. It's a veggie burger anyway."
"Fred!"
"I don't mind, Mom," Jake says.
"See!" Dad says and plops the burger on the grill, "Damn fireworks! It's Memorial Day. Not the 4th of July! That guy next door drives me crazy. At least he isn't flying his stupid plane around yet. I'd move if I could afford another house."
"Well, you know, they have to keep home prices high so people have to keep working for them. It is kind of silly to think about how much it costs just to use a piece of land and a building that was probably paid off years ago," Francine says.
"Who's 'they'?" Mom says.
"Here we go," Jake says.
"The jerks who run, or try to run, the world," Francine says.
"Oh," Mom says.
"Dammit!" Dad yells, "That crow just stole a burger!"
Smacking the air with his spatula, he chases the winged thief.
He doesn't catch it.
Blog Love Omega Glee is a novel by Wred Fright about two bloggers who fall in love while the world falls apart, which is being serialized on his blog. To start reading from the beginning or read another installment, please visit Blog Love Omega Glee Central on WredFright.Com. If you like what you've read, or you've read all of Blog Love Omega Glee and want more Fright, then please read his first novel, which is available in print and as an ebook.
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