Blog Love Omega Glee: The Hour That Never Was (11 March 2012)

A red light flashes on the broadcast board, indicating that someone is calling on the telephone. Calls in the middle of the night to the radio station aren't rare, but some nights can go without a single call. Other nights, by contrast, the phone can keep ringing with all sorts of strange questions and requests from all sorts of strange and lonely people. Since Jake isn't talking on the air, he picks up the receiver, and says, "WCYA 1020 AM Real Music Real People."

"Oh, hello, I was wondering if you knew what time it was. I was in the middle of setting my clock for daylight savings time, but then the cats got in a fight and I had to break it up, but now I don't know the time since that took a few minutes and the clock is stopped now," a voice that sounds like it comes from an elderly woman says.

"It's 4:32 a.m., ma'am."

"AM?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Not FM, I mean p.m."

"No, ma'am, a.m."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"This time thing has me all confused. I don't know why everyone has to change their clocks. If some people want to get up early, then they should just get up early, and not make the rest of society do it as well. It's like government-mandated peer pressure. So it's 4:32 a.m.?"

"Well, it's 4:33 now officially, but more or less, yes."

"Thank you! You wouldn't know how to program a VCR, would you?"

Jake thinks, "People still have VCRs?" but says, "No, ma'am, I'm sorry I don't."

"The clock just keeps flashing twelve no matter what I do."

"Good luck, ma'am."

"Goodbye."

Jake hangs up the receiver just in time to transition between two songs, a Muzaky instrumental version of "Me So Horny" by 2 Live Crew, and a new dance trance hit called "Stick Your Finger Up Your Butt" by Nbfbfdwkghbfisou8. Jake shakes his head. The station has a new music director, who's trying to update things gently for their older-skewed demographic yet still bring in a younger listenership because, as the memo read, "Otherwise, a lot of our listeners are going to die off soon, and we'll be even lower in the ratings."

"Well," Jake thinks, "At least working tonight I get paid for an hour that I never actually worked when the clocks jumped from 2 to 3. On the downside, I also had to reset all the clocks in the station, and there were clocks everywhere, and in things that don't need clocks. Why does the electric letter opener on the news desk need a clock on it? Hmm . . . I wonder if I work on the night we fall back again to standard time in the autumn if I have to work an hour for free? Why do we do this clock changing stuff anyway? I should read Francine's blog. I bet she says there's a conspiracy behind it."

The red light flashes again. Jake picks up the receiver, "WCYA 1020 AM Real Music Real People."

"It's me again. The cats got in another fight. What time is it now?"

Blog Love Omega Glee is a novel by Wred Fright about two bloggers who fall in love while the world falls apart, which is being serialized on his blog. To start reading from the beginning or read another installment, please visit Blog Love Omega Glee Central on WredFright.Com. If you like what you've read, or you've read all of Blog Love Omega Glee and want more Fright, then please read his first novel, which is available in print and as an ebook.