Sometimes Jake just has to flee the house before his parents drive him crazy. Usually, his sanctuary is Caffeine Eden. Sometimes though, Jake wants to flee Caffeine Eden. This usually corresponds to when Larry and Tom are also at Caffeine Eden, and Jake can't escape hearing the old men's conversation. Tonight, it's raining though, and Jake has nowhere else to go. He sighs and just makes sure to keep Kelly, the cute barista, in his sightline, as Larry and Tom drone on about . . .
"So, I saw Bill Swjgkljdsgdskilak at Food Wigwam," Tom says, playing with the hair coming out of his right ear.
"Old Bill. I haven't seen him in years. How's he doing?" Larry says, taking a sip of coffee.
"Not too well, I'm afraid. He was bagging my groceries."
"Bagging your groceries? He's working at Food Wigwam?"
"Yessireeboy, he is!"
"That's terrible. He's as old as us. He should be retired and enjoying life, like us."
"Well, he said Social Security wasn't enough to pay the bills. And his pension plan went kablooey when the company he worked for went bankrupt. He said he has to work just to pay for his wife's medical bills. She's got some sort of cancer."
"Wait! Didn't he bag groceries in high school at Food Wigwam?"
Tom scratches his head, "Um, I think he did, didn't he?"
"So, he went to college, and worked all those years, and he's ended up doing the same job he had in high school?"
"It looks like that. But I can understand. It's so expensive nowadays. I might even need to pick up a part-time job."
"What are you going to do?"
"Maybe I can get my old high school job back being an usher in a movie theater."
"Aren't they going to automate all those jobs? I'm surprised movie theaters still exist."
"They're automating everything. Bill's lucky that Food Wigwam still has some employees bagging groceries. A lot of stores don't do that anymore with all the self-scan checkouts."
"I wish they'd automate growing old. My knee's killing me. Tom, I don't think I could work a job even if I had to these days."
"I hope you don't ever have to get another job, Larry. I do see a lot of old people working these days at the fast food counters, the retail stores, and other places, usually with a bunch of high school kids. It's sort of strange."
"How's Bill like working with people who could be his grandkids? Can he even understand what they're talking about with all the slang they use? I can never understand a damn thing my granddaughter says."
"He said it took him awhile, but he's grown fond of his young coworkers. He said they turned him on to some cool new music, and, best of all, he likes that he can pick up a little extra money from them by buying them beer and cigarettes."
"What? He's buying them beer and cigarettes?"
"And sometimes chewing tobacco too."
"Do you remember when we used to chew?"
"Yeah, that was pretty disgusting. Remember when Zuky, the school bully, stole your can of pop and chugged it, only to find out it was full of spit?"
"That was pretty funny until he beat me up."
"Oh, that's right. Sorry, Larry."
"It's O.K. I wonder what that son of a bitch does now."
"I think he's dead. He died right after high school in an auto accident."
"Oh, so that's why he never showed up for any of the reunions."
"Well, at least he didn't have to work a crappy high school job when he was eighty."
"I guess there is some luck to dying young. I'm glad we survived though. I like being alive."
"I do miss my youthful bladder though. I have to piss again."
"Already? You just went."
"It's this coffee. Even the decaf cuts right through me."
As the talk turns to more discussion of bladder problems, Jake decides that listening to anymore of Larry and Tom's conversation will cut through him, and he goes home.
Blog Love Omega Glee is a novel by Wred Fright about two bloggers who fall in love while the world falls apart, which is being serialized on his blog. To start reading from the beginning or read another installment, please visit Blog Love Omega Glee Central on WredFright.Com. If you like what you've read, or you've read all of Blog Love Omega Glee and want more Fright, then please read his first novel, which is available in print and as an ebook.
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