Blog Love Omega Glee: Twitchy On The Thirteenth (13 January 2012)

Jake sits in the reception area of an office, waiting for a job interview. Across from him is a man with a mustache who twitches occasionally. Both Jake and Mr. Twitchy are wearing suits and ties, and Jake assumes that Mr. Twitchy is also interviewing for a job. A pleasant, red-haired receptionist comes out and offers them coffee. Mr. Twitchy accepts. Jake declines. After the receptionist leaves, Mr. Twitchy speaks to Jake, "You should have taken that coffee. That's probably the only thing we'll get out of this place today. You're here for a job too, right?"

Jake nods, uncertain whether he wants to engage in a conversation. His dad taught him positive visualization this morning, so Jake's imagining the interview going well in his mind. He decides to ignore Mr. Twitchy, and get back to where the interviewer tells Jake that having read his master's thesis, the interviewer's always dreamed of meeting him.

The lack of response doesn't deter Mr. Twitchy though. He continues on like a Shakespeare character giving a soliloquy, "I don't even know why I bothered to come in. It's Friday the 13th. It's a bad day. Even if I got this job, it would probably suck. But whether I get this job or not--and I could use the money, I got bills to pay, let me tell you I got bills--it doesn't matter because the world's going to end later this year. Did you know that?"

"Huh?" Jake says, having just been offered the job in his visualization.

"The world ends later this year. My unemployment benefits should take me just about up to then anyway so that's good timing. They even got a date: December 21st. They got it from the Maya. It's when their calendar ends. It's the date the Mayan calendar builds up to for thousands of years. It means the end of everything."

Jake scratches his head, "Couldn't it just mean it's time to start a new calendar like we do every year?"

"Hmm . . . I never thought of that," Mr. Twitchy says.

He twitches badly and spills coffee on his lap. "Dammit!" he yells, "I had too much coffee this morning. I shouldn't have taken this last cup. Coffee always makes me twitchy."

Mr. Twitchy hands Jake his coffee cup ("Here, hold this."), grabs one of the magazines in the reception area, and rubs at the coffee on his pants. After scrubbing vigorously for a few seconds he drops the magazine onto the table he picked it up from, and says, "Oh, the hell with it, the world's ending, it's Friday the 13th, I have a coffee stain on my crotch, and I ain't getting this job anyway, I can just tell."

Mr. Twitchy grabs his coat and gets up and leaves, "Good luck, buddy."

Jake watches him disappear, and thinks, "Could the world have an ending? It must have had a beginning. Actually if the world ended, that would take care of a lot of my problems."

Not thinking, Jake looks at the cup of coffee in his hand and takes a sip. "Not bad," he thinks.

"Mr. Katz?" the receptionist calls.

"Uh, he left. He said he had to catch an apocalypse I think," Jake says.

"Hmm . . . well, it is Friday the 13th. I've heard stranger excuses. Then you're up Mr. Falls, please follow me.

Jake feels twitchy as he gets up.

Blog Love Omega Glee is a novel by Wred Fright about two bloggers who fall in love while the world falls apart, which is being serialized on his blog. To start reading from the beginning or read another installment, please visit Blog Love Omega Glee Central on WredFright.Com. If you like what you've read, or you've read all of Blog Love Omega Glee and want more Fright, then please read his first novel, which is available in print and as an ebook.