Blog Love Omega Glee: Rob Poorpeople For President! (9 January 2012)

In a previously vacant storefront on Believer Square, a campaign office for the Rob Poorpeople for President of The United States Of America campaign has opened up. Francine noticed it last week, but today her curiosity compels her to step inside. The office is nearly empty except for a few cardboard boxes of campaign materials, two desks with notebook computers and telephones on them, and some posters of Poorpeople on the wall. A bell rings as Francine enters and she can hear someone talking in a back room, but no one comes to the front office. Francine waits a moment, then circles the room reading the posters.

The first shows Poorpeople, a skinny middle-aged white man with grey hair currently representing Ohio in the U.S. Senate, holding a piglet on the Senate floor on the left side of the poster, and Poorpeople sitting at a farm country diner dangling a strip of bacon over his mouth on the right side of the poster. The caption reads, "This little piggy went to Washington, but Poorpeople butchered it before it fed at the public trough. Vote Poorpeople for President: He keeps pigs on your plate and out of the federal budget."

The second shows Poorpeople kissing a pregnant woman's belly and the caption reads, "Even if you aren't old enough to vote yet, Rob still cares about you. Vote Poorpeople for President: If we don't forget the fetus, then they can never defeat us."

The third shows Poorpeople in an ill fitting suit giving two thumbs up as dollar bills rain down around him, and the caption reads, "Two thumbs up for business! Vote Poorpeople for President: Because rich people do enough for society as it is; they shouldn't have to pay taxes too."

The fourth shows Poorpeople blowing out the smoking barrel of a rifle, and the caption reads, "It's time America showed leadership and took over the rest of the world. Vote Poorpeople for President: Get your gun and help Rob kick ass, and take gas!"

The fifth shows Poorpeople with his arms around people in a diverse crowd of people with different ethnicities, genders, classes, abilities, ages, sexual orientations, and so forth, and the caption reads: "Let's bring the common sense of Ohio back to the insanity of Washington D.C. Vote Poorpeople for President: Sure, America is full of all types of people, but we all know that only one type belongs in the White House."

As Francine shakes her head to make sure she hasn't misread the repugnance of the posters, a man talking on a cell phone and wearing a Poorpeople for President t-shirt comes out of the back. He says, "Our numbers look good. Donations are up, but we need more volunteers. For example, I don't have anybody else here, and the primary's just a few weeks away."

The man hangs up and looks at Francine, "Can I help you?"

Francine says, "I'm here to volunteer."

Blog Love Omega Glee is a novel by Wred Fright about two bloggers who fall in love while the world falls apart, which is being serialized on his blog. To start reading from the beginning or read another installment, please visit Blog Love Omega Glee Central on WredFright.Com. If you like what you've read, or you've read all of Blog Love Omega Glee and want more Fright, then please read his first novel, which is available in print and as an ebook.